Rachel Getting...Whatever

It took me nearly a day to finally figure out why Rachel Getting Married bugged me so much. Jonathan Demme seemed to have taken a 48-hour period of just-released-from-rehab family reunion drama and turned it into a boring, indulgent “why make this movie?” experience. If you’ve ever seen an episode of the A&E series, Intervention, you’ll know what I mean.

I just recently saw an episode of Intervention about a young woman with a revolting addiction to inhaling propellant (from Dust Off cans). The gritty realism of her self-absorbed, angry state was painful yet compelling to watch. More heartbreaking, even still, were her family’s attempts to cope with and care for her.

Watching this story was like being tossed into a washing machine. Near drowning, tumbling into bedlam, and somehow making it through to be alive again, at the end. You couldn’t help but be truly touched as the program ended with her, barely recognizable, as a pretty young woman, free of that awful addiction that had previously turned her into a monster.

In "Rachel Getting Married," however, there is nothing but the “gritty realism” of a rich Connecticut girl at her sister’s wedding. Too much time spent on overly long scenes of singing celebrations (which involved a melange of ethnic music, dance and food usually only seen in movies) and weirdness (a dishwasher loading contest? really?) had me so restless I actually got up to do my own dishwasher loading to break the boredom.

Unsympathetic characters in this fake world made the movie a failure, in my opinion. I can’t fault the actors here. I think it was the writing. For a better, more meaningful film-watching experience, check out an episode of Intervention. Gritty realism on the house.

Classics look New as Recyclables grow Tired

Egad!- Jessi and I have not been tending this blog since fall arrived. Let’s say we are both rebooting as our real lives get tangled with error messages. I did reboot my home theater here as well and have gone hi-def and Blu-Ray because I couldn’t handle the envy.

I have found bliss with this new setup and I can now see both good and bad films with excellent sound and picture. One of my first films screened was “The Godfather- the Coppola Restoration” (5 shakers) Being from North Jersey this film was practically scripture and the Blu-Ray edition is amazing. The film was shot super low-light but now you can make out things that were previously lost in the darkness (Like Lil Mikey's soul). The sound design also pops especially during the scene where Michael kills for the first time and later when Sonny pays his toll.

To see some detailed CGI on the system I rented “Spiderman 3” and “The Incredible Hulk” both again rehashing old comic book material. “Spiderman’ thankfully ends this franchise but on a bad note as spidey goes bad and Tobey Maguire even rough houses embarrassingly at a jazz club. (Don’t ask). “The Hulk” reboots confusingly since the film seems to be a sequel but the previous film (Ang Lee’s “Hulk” from 2003) had a giant Hulk downing helicopters whereas this hulk has a large but fixed size. Lou Ferrigno, the old 1980’s TV Hulk appears in the obligatory cameo. The "Hulk" is technically amazing but just loud, stupid and unecessary. I give both these films 3 shakers for tech reasons only.

All this rehashing and of comic books yet brings up a point about Hollywood today. From the 20’s through the 50’s film primarily adapted great works of literature. Producers tried hard to elevate what some saw as a pedestrian and vulgar medium. Todays' producers just seem to shoot for a low common denominator. Enough with the comic books already! Sure I enjoyed “Iron Man” and "The Dark Knight” but are these stories really worthy of the giant budgets and hype? In old times the “Buck Rogers” folk were kept in the “B Movie" category where they belong. Let’s shoot higher people- yes we can!

Then because I hate myself, I rented “Get Smart”. Steve Carrelll drags his expressionless mug around this sad rehash. (I want to laugh but I just find him boring). Instead of being the everyman fool Maxwell Smart is now multi-lingual, a brilliant analyst and a reformed fatty. The old TV Siegfried makes his cameo and Ann Hathaway is plenty sexy, but she alone can’t save this sad excuse for a flick. (I must say here “Missed it by that much!”- I apologize) One shaker dammit!

Finally I checked out “How the West was Won” one of only two feature dramatic films made in three-camera Cinerama. The elements have been joined seamlessly and the depth of field is amazing. I was blown away by this- while the story is weak- the camerawork really captures the majesty of the west. The buffalo stampede and train shootout stand out on this wonderful old school, star studded feature. I say four shakers to the old west and thanks Cinerama for leading the way to the 70 mm wide-screen format and the re-introduction of epic filmaking.

We’ve come so far technically- let’s move it forward creatively. We conquered the west and survived "Godfather III" - now let's beat remake mediocrity.

"Outsourced" - Falling in Love with third world labor

I agree with Jessi and think this is a fun, laidback and quirky flick, however I withhold a 5th salt shaker and think that “Local Hero” was both similar and superior. Co-Writer/Director John Jeffcoat has great fun both with the clash of cultures and the fish out of water aspects of our lead character and the economic setup is timely and on target. This may, God forbid, be the first of a subgenre as the US continues to ship its jobs overseas for cheaper labor.

In "Outsourced" the cinematography is colorful and soundtrack has some great Indian music on it. My problem was that I thought the romantic angle suffered since it seemed a little too contrived and there was a lack of sexual chemistry between the leads. In fact our main character Todd (Josh Hamilton) goes from angry American to super manager to enamored lover without much change in his vacant expressions. This is a romcom man, step it up! The Indian workers also seemed a little bit too much like the comedic yet lovable African American servants as depicted in ‘Gone with the Wind’ and other older American films. Later as a xenophobic American caller leans that his product is now cheaper since it’s not made in the US, he seems pleased. So the politics of this flick are a little skewed to keep it breezy. Layoffs of call center workers occur without any negativity (most of them not even happening on camera), as social commentary takes a back seat to the humor of culture clash and romance. (“Is this wrong?” we all collectively ask)

To the filmakers credit, however, it points out the quandary we Americans face as we continue to buy cheaper products made in sweatshops in China. The bottom line is that politics aside; it’s a fun film with a lot of charm and wonderful sights and sounds while tiptoeing around very thorny issues. I also really identified with the mad quest for a real cheeseburger; a very funny scene. The US managers reminded me of the British military officers in films like “Lawrence of Arabia” as they move personnel like chess pieces while ignoring the fact that their empire is coming to an end. Asif Basra, as this films’ Gunga Din (wannabe manager instead of soldier) turns in a great performance.

Coincidentally, (and speaking of cheeseburgers) I saw another good film recently with an Indian flavor. “The Namesake” features Kal Penn (who played Kumar in the “Harold and Kumar” films) playing it straight as a self-centered yuppie who, like a lot of us, doesn’t really appreciate his heritage or the sacrifices of his parents. This film transcends the culture to tell a universal story and is very understated and touching. Irrfan Khan as the father is a standout as a decent man who defies movie stereotypes. It’s a bit rambling but still a heartfelt journey. Four Curry shakers again.

I feel like tandoori chicken now dammit!

(Disclosure: Tim has worked in call centers and had really high sales and short talk times)

"Outsourced" (2006): Sweet as Banana Lassi

‘Americans get angry over their jobs being outsourced. But aren’t so many of the products they buy made in China?’

This is just one of the smart observations made in this endearing, beautifully told story. Watching “Outsourced” feels like watching a foreign film at it’s best. Rich, intriguing characters, a reluctant outsider, and a warm, unfolding culture. An American employee is shipped off to India when the novelty company he works for decides to outsource their sales support. Josh Hamilton plays the culturally insensitive American who slowly opens his mind, and heart, to a new culture...a new way of thinking.


(<---- The adorable Ayesha Dharker)
I couldn’t help but be reminded of “Local Hero” (1983), in which Peter Riegert’s pre-Bill Murray, intricately underplayed character is sent to Scotland to buy a village where his company plans to build an oil refinery. Outsourced is a little funnier, a little lighter, but achieves the same feeling, nonetheless.

I had the honor of performing in a staged reading of one of George Wing’s works in progress when I lived in Seattle. His previous hit, “50 First Dates,” has the same romantic heart. His collaboration with John Jeffcoat has produced a thinking person’s love story, that takes a look at the day to day realities of outsourcing American jobs.

There’s no Hollywood prerequisite “edginess” here— no murders, explosions. Just an economics/love story that really blew me away. This is the first film I’m rating 5 salt shakers..... a classic, a must-see.

“Kabluey” - An icon of anxious times

A dimwitted underachiever trapped in an absurd work assignment is sent out to humiliate himself for a business that never lived up to its potential. A military wife is trapped without benefits as her husbands’ duty in Iraq is extended yet again. A grocery store cashier takes Polaroids of suspected child kidnappers while an old man loves his thermos and a local Don Juan beds everyone possible. All these folks inhabit “Kabluey” a great little film where all the characters seem trapped and desperate. The desolate roads, unfinished office buildings, second rate grocery stores, seedy motels and soulless Mcmansions are perfectly captured as a setting for our main character, a hangdog shell shocked Salman (writer/director Scott Prendergast) who spends much of this flick in a giant blue padded suit with an oversized orb head. He is simply trying to pass out flyers to rent out the unused office space in a near abandoned corporate headquarters, dressed as its' generic brand icon.

A first rate cast and well tuned offbeat tone show just how an indie can get it right where so many have gone wrong. Sure ‘Kanbluey’ has its faults but how can you resist a film where a small child evilly vows to kill our hero and then actually attempts it. Terri Garr makes a hilarious extended cameo as an insane courier and Lisa Kudrow as the lonely wife does a good job with a tough role. Most importantly the utter anxiety and absurdity of our times seems to be captured from the war to the economy and the loneliness of trying to survive while doing what’s right. Our heroes are not brand cartoon characters - just ordinary folks finding their inner good. Prendergrast seems to have channeled Chaplin (or Buster Keaton) for these modern times.

“Charlie Bartlett” & “Be Kind, Rewind” – They Suck!

Are we down to one shaker cinema? In that case let me save time and give you two-for-one: a high school afternoon special and a video store fiasco.

In “Charlie Bartlett” (2007) we are supposed to find this Richy-Rich lovable ala Ferris Bueller. However, outside of the irony of Robert Downey Jr. as a principal trying to warn kids off drugs, this film is ridiculous and flat. Anton Yelchin as the title character tries hard and with his wealth and crazy mom alludes to “Harold & Maude” right down to a song plucked from that film that no teenager on earth would be singing. Besides borrowing from better coming of age films, the heavy handed moralizing on teen drug use, authority and personal identity are just too awkward and stagey. While I give it credit for trying to be a step up from the gross-out films of the teen comedy genre, this one is just the wrong prescription. “Superbad”, “Election” and the oldie “Fast Times at Ridgemont High” show us how serious issues can be covered in a high school setting without sacrificing the laughs.

Speaking of high school, “Be Kind, Rewind” (2008) is set in Passaic, NJ which is next to my hometown hood of Clifton. However, that city will not be sending the filmmakers a “thank you” note anytime soon since the city is played up as being a major slum which is a slight exaggeration. Writer-director Michael Gondry who gave us the very good “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind “and the very bad “The Science of Sleep” puts another in the bad column. Mos Def is just not funny and Jack Black is occasionally funny but not allowed to shine. The story of a store that has all its' VHS tapes erased. (Yes Passaic has also just heard of DVDs) only to have our two heroes replace them with shorter parodies of their own making should be hilarious. Yet only some of the parodies are even funny, and they only come after an overlong setup which involves evil city officials and Fats Waller. (Don’t ask!) This film actually looks like it was slapped together by the two idiots themselves and goes from bad to almost unwatchable. How did Danny Glover, Mia Farrow and Sigourney Weaver get pulled into this mess? Be kind to yourself and miss this and re-rent “Clerks”.

09.02.08 “Ginger Snaps” (2000): And I Snap Back

Years ago, when first auditioning for one of my agents, we had an interesting discussion about monologues. “Never do a monologue about a dead dog,” she said, referring to the monologue performed by the actor who had auditioned before me, leaving her disgusted and completely turned off.

Within the first two minutes of “Ginger Snaps,” we encounter a mother and toddler discovering the bloody, dismembered body of their dog. To alleviate any doubts as to what you are seeing, the camera then moves slowly over the bloody, furry pieces (inner and outer) of what remains of the dog.

Now I know what my agent meant. Fictional films that start out with bloody murdered dogs belong in the same amateur trash pile as monologues about dead dogs. Think I’m just being sentimental? Read the screenwriting book, “Save the Cat,” by Blake Snyder. Think I’m being overly critical of an obvious werewolf horror flick? Well, I kind of feel that story trumps all, subtlety is gold, and no one has yet been able to surpass the dark, heart-breaking beauty of John Landis’ 1981 classic, “An American Werewolf in London.”